


Lurline Halliman
FindHopeAndLive
(Hope for the Depressed)
A place of solace for those who believe they are alone in the dark
A book and website that speak simply and honestly from the heart about Love, Heartbreak, Emotional Pain & Suicidal Depression, and The God Who surpasses them all through Unfathomable Grace

My Story
Hi there, I am Lurline Halliman (L. Iona Halliman). I am delighted to welcome you to FindHopeAndLive. This is a website where I will share with you the dark and painful days of my life as a suicidally depressed person who desperately wanted to die to escape the torture that is called:
DEEP/CLINICAL/SUICIDAL DEPRESSION.
Here, I will tell you as best as I can what suicidal depression was like for me and that there is hope even when you can't see or experience it. I will also tell you that there can be life again in all its beauty after an encounter with suicidal depression.
Here also I will extol the God who used my greatest suffering for my higher good and showed Himself strong on my behalf when I was too weak to do life as usual.
I will share with you excerpts from the book that poured out of me like water from a jar. It is a little pink book that details my experience with suicidal depression and offers praises to the Saviour who saved me from the deep, dark abyss and Lifted My Head to breathe the revived breath of life.
This colossal depression, a condition that could easily be described as the worst thing that could befall anyone, resulted from the very intense emotional pain I experienced after being soundly rejected by my husband after a period of separation and seeking reconciliation. This pain was heightened by the apparent flaunting of his newfound love.
The book does not give a detailed background of my marriage as it was not written for that purpose. The content is very Christian and details my experiences within the broader experience of clinical depression.
It is also, most importantly, a testimony of God’s enduring faithfulness through the darkest, most painful and seemingly hopeless period of my life. It will be best appreciated by and most valuable to those, especially in Christendom, who are struggling with clinical depression and need to know that they are not alone. The book will also be valuable to anyone who needs comfort, hope and assurance in their time of suffering.
When I was walking through the valley of clinical depression, I also read someone else's book and it became a tower of strength and hope for me because it assured me that another human being had experienced what I was now experiencing and I dared to believe that if that person could have survived it, then maybe, just maybe, I could survive it too.
As you go through the pages of this website, my earnest prayer is that you will find a place of solace -- relief, rest, encouragement, strength and hope.
Thanks to the many people who helped in one way or another, great or small, to walk me through the process. Thanks especially to my then-roommate, Angela, for being the force behind my going to church many Sundays. God bless you all - always.
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PICTURE ALBUM
WITHIN FIFTEEN MONTHS BEFORE DEPRESSION



Miss Jamaica Mother of the Year Contest 1999
First Picture
On one of our contest tours somewhere in St. Thomas
Second Picture
Talent Night
I sang 'Love Will Be Our Home'.
Third Picture
Contest Night
I was the lead singer in the group of contestants singing a song I do not remember.

At Work
My co-worker and dear friend prettied me up and took pictures of me.
First Picture
DURING DEPRESSION

Second Picture

CHAPTER 1 – SIN AND SEPARATION
'The vilest among us savours the most bountiful of God's grace.'
Lurline Halliman
In the United States
In Florida visiting my brother and his wife, and my sister
My friends and well-wishers in Jamaica kept encouraging me to travel to help ease the depression. However, one cannot escape oneself and in Florida, I missed my husband even more than when I was in Jamaica. At nights there, I was so depressed I could not even sleep on the bed I had in a room by myself. Most nights I slept (or tried to sleep) on the carpet either in the bedroom or in the living room.
Third Picture
WITHIN ONE YEAR AFTER DEPRESSION


Back to Life
At Work
These pictures were taken at the same spot (not by design) where the former depressed pictures were taken. The difference is clear.
First Set of Pictures


Back to Life
First Picture
Out and about in St. Elizabeth, Jamaica
Second Picture
At home picture-taking with my daughter


Back to Life
At Work
Second Set of Pictures
